I have given a lot of thought on sharing this over the last couple months. So speaking freely, with no rhyme or reason, I’m going to share something. Try to stay with me.
I blog a lot about Intuitive Eating, body positivity, and self-acceptance. And… I have *gasp* fat loss goals.
I’ve had a lot of hesitance in sharing this for many reasons. For starters, diet culture. Have you ever noticed how women bond over sharing diety mindsets, hating our bodies, and other such misery? I don’t want to get roped into discussion about fad diets, how bad you think gluten and sugar is, cheat days, how people think being fat=unhealthy, etc etc… Let’s talk about reasonable, balanced living and stop judging each other. We are more than our bodies, you are not a bad person for eating cake at your kids birthday.
Next- I don’t want someone to try and sell me anything. I don’t want it. Being in the fitness world I’m already offered all sorts of products to try and by admitting I have fat loss goals could open up another box of sales pitches.
What else? Because when I share something personal like this I honestly feel like I owe an explanation for wanting something for myself, for the skin I’m in otherwise my message gets misinterpreted. I worried about what if people unfollow my page? Or think I’m a hypocrite? (And if you do- it’s your choice. I’m making peace with that) As I’ve been a relatively active member in the body positive and intuitive eating communities by encouraging others to pursue their dreams at any size (such as teaching group fitness, trying something new, initiating sexy time when they feel insecure) it’s also discouraging to see women get torn down for admitting they are uncomfortable in their new body, struggling to adapt to freedom from undieting, and completing an absolute 180 in mental health- it’s such a complicated process inside and out. We are still telling women how to live and what to feel. We CAN love our bodies as they are, AND choose methods of self-care that may lead to differences in body composition.
A few weeks ago I watched the movie “Embrace” and this line from the movie sums up exactly how I feel about my health and body.
“This body of mine, it’s not an ornament. It’s a vehicle. So I want to fuel it well, and I want to move it and be healthy BUT I want to do it on MY terms.”
One of the gaps of understanding I refuse to restrict food groups, count calories and make my life revolve around weight loss while also acknowledging I have goals to live a balanced life is the process to get there. In many ways it appears on the outside there are 2 polar opposites: The dieting industry which encourages rules, rigidity and weight loss; and the body positive world which is all about accepting yourself no matter what and pretty blunt that weight loss should never be encouraged. It’s a very confusing process when you feel like you go from one extreme to the other trying to find that sweet spot. Our society is struggling to find BALANCE in nearly every aspect of our lives and it’s driving us to extremes.
I got lucky. At the end of the holiday season last year I finally found my balance. The safe place where I could say “I love my body, I love my life, and I love intuitive eating. I’m wanting to change a few things without going back to old habits and I don’t know how to do it”. They didn’t judge or finger wag or tell me that my goals were irrelevant because I was surrounded by diet culture. A place that valued my whole health and lived out what they taught. They didn’t try to “no excuses” me to death or tell me what diet to try to lose weight fast. It was a place where they KNEW exactly how I felt because they had been in that exact place. A place where there was BALANCE and support, in the Balance 365 program. They meet you exactly where you are, support your whole health and encourage self-care, with the option to support fat loss goals IF it’s what YOU want. It’s up to YOU.
If you find yourself in the same position, I’d encourage you to watch their video below that goes into their backgrounds and philosophy. Then- get involved in their Healthy Habits Happy Moms community. Jen, Annie and Lauren are amazing and aren’t afraid to be in the sticky middle to help women balance their lives.